PRESLEY, jackson neil - incomplete

[jackson neil presley]

leave my door open just a crack
(please take me away from here)
cause i feel like such an insomniac
(please take me away from here
why do i tire of counting sheep?
(please take me away from here)
when i'm far too tired to fall asleep

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Jackson Neil Presley
"Jack, Jacks, JP, Presley"

"In this space, type a detailed history on your character. We want to know where they came from and who they are. All information such as likes, dislikes, goals, strengths, weaknesses etc. are optional, however, the more information you include about your character, the more likely you are to be accepted.
In this description of your character, you must include their personality, family and home life, and their history. These things are mandatory."

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how can i decide what's right?.

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when you're clouding up my mind.[/font][/i]

i cant win you're losing fight[/size][/b][/color]
all the time.[/font][/i]

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RIIIIIING!

That was it, the indication that fourth period had begun, and while most of the seniors who had study hall this period wasted no time in escaping the jail that bind them here every day for nine and a half months. Most of them would hop in their cars and go for an hour long joy ride, and some would run off to the library to study, yet others would simply head off to the courtyard to catch some fresh air and enjoy the warm weather Australia had to offer.

While Caprice would have usually been using the opportunity to spend time with Decklen or Summer, or even sun bathe in the courtyard or on their schools stadium field, she found herself with a trouble mind and heart pacing back and forth in front of classroom number two hundred and forty.

She'd never quite understood how they'd come up with the numbers for the classrooms in this school, but today, the big, black, bold numbers painted on every wooden door lining the empty hallways was the last thing on her mind. Instead, memories of her summer's past flooded her mind, between sweet kisses and steamy, foggy sexual intercourse. They'd had dinner, lunch, and breakfast together, walked along the beach holding hands, spent lazy afternoons watching movies or playing video games, and on endlessly romantic and perfect nights they would spend their time getting to know everything about each other. Their fling had been her ideal vision of a relationship, and when the summer was over, she was called back home into the loving arms of her boyfriend, and he was called back to work. Never had she expected to see Maxwell Read in her first period English class..teaching the class!

Caprice's heels clicked against the marble floor as she took deep breaths, one right after another, attempting to calm her racing heart and ease her nerves.

"This can't happen.."

She nodded her head in agreement with herself, taking another deep breath before continuing, still pacing outside of the empty classroom, the classroom she knew he was sitting inside of creating a curriculum or putting together a homework assignment.

"He's a teacher..and you're his student..and you didn't know!"

It had sounded more convincing in her head than it had out loud in the empty hallways. It was consoling to know that he had been just as surprised to see her, however, as she had been to see him.

Caprice played over the past few months events in her head. She still couldn't understand how she'd missed it, how she hadn't known he was a teacher at her school. Neither of this had seen this coming, and while Caprice wasn't big on surprises, she was big on fairy tales, fate and serendipitous occurrences.

Picking her feet up, the feisty brunette began pacing back and forth again, her heels echoing throughout the bare hallways as she desperately attempted to organize her thoughts, make any sense out of the situation at all. She was scared out of her wits at the moment.

Caprice had always known her heart belonged to Decklen. Their group of friends had hung out together since grade school or longer, and while she hadn't truly known Decklen until seventh grade, she'd known at hello that he would be the one to take care of her for the rest of her life through drunken rages and sincere moments. It wasn't long until the two hit it off, becoming best friends, and eventually, lovers.

Now, with the cheating mess he'd created, she'd drowned her sorrows in shots of whiskey and beers. leading her to Max, a rebound man she'd never believed she'd see again, and while she could have wished away the memories, pretended none of it had ever happened to subside her guilty conscience, she would have been lying to herself, she would have been untrue to her heart which had become completely infatuated with him. He was everything she'd been wishing for and more.

"Ugh!"

She groaned, sliding her back against the wall before plopping down on the ground, running her hands through her hair out of frustration. She couldn't believe this was happening, and at the same time, she couldn't completely say she was sorry it had.

"Mr. Read.."

Caprice wrinkled her nose up at the sound of the name the man had given to his class today. It had made him sound so old, and it made her feel uncomfortable thinking of him with the title mister. She'd grown so used to Max that any other title sounded odd belonging to him.

"Oh boy.."

Oh boy was right and she was ready to give in. What exactly she was giving into was unclear at the moment.

all the things she said, all the things she said
running through my head, running through my mind, running through my head
all the things she said, all the things she said
running through my head, all the things she said
this is not enough

Caprice lifted herself from the ground taking one more deep breath before placing her hand on the silver knob of the heavy, wooden door, but she paused again, biting her bottom lip gently. Her heart had begun pounding again, and she couldn't believe she was about to do this. Half of her knew she had to for his sake, and for hers. She had to be strong, fight against her weak, and fragile teenage heart to protect both of them.

i'm in serious shit, i feel totally lost
if i'm asking for help, it's only because
being with you has opened my eyes
could i ever believe such a perfect surprise?

Slowly turning the knob to the door, she felt paralyzed, her whole being growing numb as she tried to center herself from having been torn between two different worlds.

i keep asking myself, wondering how
i keep closing my eyes, but i can't block you out
wanna fly to a place where it's just you and me
nobody else, so we can be free

There wasn't any other time, there was a here and now, and this couldn't wait any longer. Biting harder onto her bottom lip, a look of pain crossed her face as she looked over her shoulder one last time to make sure they'd be alone. and when she was almost positive they were, she closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and prayed for a miracle.

all the things she said, all the things she said
running through my head, running through my head, running through my head
all the things she said, all the things she said
running through my head, running through my head, all the things she said
this is not enough, this is not enough

Dodging into the classroom in a quick and swift motion as if she were a government spy lurking around the building, Caprice practically slammed the door behind her, quickly straightening her posture and smiling sweetly towards the charming brunette.

"Hi.."

She waved her hand in an over dramatic gesture before tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. This was unreal, facing the man she'd spent all summer infatuated with in an awkward face to face.

i'm all mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed
they say it's my fault but i want her so much
wanna fly her away where the sun and rain
come in over my face, wash away all the shame

Her cheeks were a pale pink color as she tried connecting the perfect words she had up in her head with the words that would roll off of the tip of her tongue, and as she struggled with the adjustment, she remained silent, a pain stricken look on her face.

She never spoke, instead, she stood struggling with the temptation to march up to him and press her lips against her, but there's only so long you could fight temptation.

when they stop and stare, don't worry me
cause i'm feeling for her what she's feeling for me
i can try to pretend, i can try to forget
but it's driving me mad, going out of my head

Caprice let go of everything in that moment, including her strength and independence, and in the heat of the moment, looking into his coffee shaded eyes, she marched right up to him, placed her hands on either side of his face and kissed him, her lips pressing firmly against his. She needed it back, the warmth he brought when he held her in his arms, and the weakness that surged throughout her body every time their lips met in a passionate embrace.

She couldn't get herself together, she was soaking in the pain of all of it, and while she allowed herself to continue kissing him, her mind race back to thoughts of Decklen. She'd promised him he'd had her heart all along, but it was a lie. The truth was, her heart was drifting, and while this couldn't possibly work, she still felt herself losing grip on the realty she'd just found was a lie.

Pulling back, she took a step back, looking, boldly, and directly into his eyes.

"I'm sorry.."

Tears formed in her eyes, but she refused to let them fall. She felt terrible for having lied to him.

"I am so sorry for having lied.."

She paused, collecting her thoughts and taking a deep breath before speaking again.

"I shouldn't have, but you can't deny what we felt.."

She said it without hesitation, knowing he'd felt as completely infatuated with her as she'd been with him. Everything they'd had was completely, and undeniably real.

"that doesn't change just because of this..how old I really am, and who we are.."

She was one hundred percent positive in every word she spoke, but she'd lost track of why she'd truly come into the classroom, and when she'd organized herself enough to remember, the pain started all over again, butterflies quickly multiplying and fluttering in her stomach while she grew nauseous and a lump formed in her throat.

"If I had known..I would have stopped it so it wouldn't come to this..Max.."

Max. As accustomed as she'd become to calling him by that name, it sounded so inappropriate in their current position, standing in a classroom. She started her sentence over, finding the strength to carry her through her words, grudgingly speaking them.

"Max, I just don't think this would be good for either of us."

She stood strong to back her words up, although any one in their right mind could see how weak she truly was under all of it. She didn't want to speak them. She wanted him to push his papers aside and lay her on his desk before taking complete control of her.

"You have your career to look at and I have.."

She paused, not believing at first, the words that were about to come out of her mouth. As much as she loved Decklen, and as terrible as she'd felt about all of this, she couldn't bring herself to believe that Decklen was the one any more.

"my relationship...."

She twisted her lips in an unpleasant form, looking down to the ground, folding her arms across her chest, praying he wouldn't take a word she'd just said seriously. Praying he wouldn't believe her. Caprice could only hope that right now would be the moment some one called her out on a bluff.

mother, looking at me
tell me what do you see?
yes, i've lost my mind

daddy, looking at me
will i ever be free?
have i crossed the line?

word count: 2025
outfit: clickety.
credit: haley loser face ` at caution 2.0 for the template, boo for banner.
status: complete.
jams: decode >> paramore
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